I know I've said it a million times but Matthew truly was my gift from God. When I found out I was pregnant, I was in a very unhealthy marriage. Four months into my pregnancy, I found myself going through a divorce. Had Matthew not been gifted to me, I might just have stayed unhappy and miserable all my life. But God saw things differently.
So, here I was, four months pregnant and alone. But instead of falling into a crumbling mess on the floor and blaming God for this poor timing, I instead realized that God had given me a reason to not be focused on myself. God was using my baby to force me to trust Him and to step out in faith with Him, knowing full well, it would take complete faith in God for me to do this on my own. God knew I needed that push and Matthew did that.
Flash forward to four months after Matthew was born and I began dating my now husband, Chris. Chris will be the first to admit, dating me was fine but he had kids already and wasn't looking for a baby to add to the mix. But as we continued to spend time together, Chris felt God was giving him another opportunity to be a great Dad. Nineteen years later, he's still being a great Dad.
Which brings me to today. It always amazes me how God can use all our junk and turn it into something incredible. God truly takes the ugly and makes it beautiful. It's just who He is. He doesn't waste any of it. And if you are really paying attention, you can look back and see the little specks of light on your life when God has done just that, made it beautiful.
On Father's Day, Matthew came into the living room where Chris and I were watching a movie and asked if he could talk to Chris. I knew what this conversation was to be about but I had to play it cool, I couldn't give anything away. Matthew went on to talk to Chris about how he has always been there for him since he was a baby and that even though he had a biological father, that the relationship with him was never like his with Chris. Matthew continued saying that Chris had always taken care of him through the good and the bad, had always supported him, always been involved in his life, he in all aspects was his Dad...and so, Matthew asked Chris if he would adopt him.
I know, I know...the math doesn't add up right? Matthew's 19, why is he asking now? Well, let me answer that for you. Evidently Matthew has wanted this for a long time but he knew that his biological father would never agree to it regardless of their lack of a relationship and so Matthew has been waiting for the day he was old enough to step out on his own and ask his Dad to adopt him as an adult adoption.
The moment the words left Matthew's mouth, I could see the glistening in Chris' eyes. This has been what Chris has wanted all his life. There has never been a moment that Chris has not been Matthew's Dad. Chris has always been there, always given all he had, always been the man in Matthew's life. And so, it was with great joy that Chris said, of course.
And then the ball started rolling. Shortly after Father's Day, I reached out to an attorney's office and they began the process of making Matthew's request official. Paperwork was signed, notarized and filed with the courts...and then we got a court date.
The week leading up to our court date, Matthew and I were a bit anxious. Not Chris, he was soaring on cloud nine! So early in the morning on August 8th, we walked into Judge Scarlett's court room ready to consent to this adoption and by 9:00am, it was official. Matthew became an Evoy!
I can look back over my life and see God's hand at work. I used to beat myself up that I had a broken past and I caused my son to have to deal with my choices but not so much these days. These days I can see where God gifted me Matthew and used all that garbage from my first marriage to bring both Matthew and I to today. Not a single moment of yuck was missed by God. Not a single moment of hurt was forgotten by God. Not a single moment of guilt was accepted by God. Instead, God used all that hurt, all that guilt, all that yuck for His glory.
It says in Ephesians 1:5, God tells us, "In love, he predestined us to be adopted as his sons through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will". God is all about adoption. God has adopted each of us into His family so why on earth would he not honor and glorify an adoption involving his children?
I want to feel bad for Matthew's biological father but I just can't. I have to look at the situation and say to myself, he chose this path. He chose no relationship and because of that, God provided Matthew with Chris. Chris has stepped up as a Dad in every way a Dad can. And now, because of this adoption, Chris is now not just Matthew's Dad but he is also his Father. "Whoever receives one such child in my name receives me"- Matthew 18:5.
Chris accepted Matthew and I nineteen years ago when we walked into his life. God has brought us to this moment of celebration in our family. God has been here from the very beginning for each of us. God knew what each of us needed and God knew that one day, one day, our testimony would include how God used the ugly in our lives and made it into a beautiful masterpiece full of love and family.
I couldn't imagine how my life would have turned out if God had not gifted me Matthew. Where would I be? Oh how I would have missed the blessings to come if I had not stepped out in faith and trusted God with this little gift from above. Oh what a great God we have walking with us that he can take the ugly and make it into something beautiful...that's who He is.
So, without further ado....I'd like to introduce you to our son, Matthew Allen Evoy. Cue the stork, It's a BOY! And this Momma would have it no other way! To God be the Glory!
 |
